Kamalika's Story
We
had decided to have a home birth, quite early on during the first 3 months of
pregnancy. Pete had slight reservations at the beginning, but as soon as Andrea
was on board any fears he may have had, evaporated. (we also live spitting
distance from our local hospital ..which I suppose gave us the ‘comfort’
factor). ‘Home’ just felt totally the most natural place to have our baby.
We wanted to have a pool too, for pain relief ( and had an open mind about
birthing in water ..great if possible .. no problem if not )
I
felt really well during most of the pregnancy. ( just the usual nausea and bouts
of extreme tiredness for first 12
weeks). I attended prenatal yoga classes for the last six months which was
fantastic, dranks loads of raspberry leaf tea, read loads of pregnancy books and generally felt the glow! Most of the
antenatal visits with Andrea were spent in the garden, getting to know one
another and enjoying the summer sunshine..lovely.
I
only had two and half weeks maternity leave before my due date ( the joy’s of
self employment ) but made the most of it by nesting and slowing the pace right
down.
Due
date was 29th October which came and went . So we started trying all
the natural inducers on Andreas list ..eating copius amounts of pineapple,
taking evening primrose oil etc. After 12 day’s and no signs, I started to
feel a little impatient ..but reminded myself to go with the flow . Pete had
been tied up with very tight work related deadlines ..so subconsciously maybe I
was ‘holding on’ for a good time !
The
pool had already been up ( but not filled for two weeks!) .
Had acupuncture twice and Andrea did a couple of cervical sweeps to get things
going …and sure enough things kicked in .
Although
I’d had period like cramps for at least a month before the birth, at about
9.15 pm on November 12th we noticed there was more regularity about
them ..( every 3 - 5 minutes ..lasting 15 – 30 seconds and I’d also had a
show the night before so all the right signs were there). We called Andrea to
let her know things had started, she’d just got home after a hard day on the
road (good timing!) she said she’d pack up the car ready ( she was in
Guildford ..we’re in Brighton ) and to give her another call when things
hotted up..
For
the next few hours the contractions were very manageable, I was happily chatting
/ laughing in between. Pete decided to get prepared putting nice music on,
lighting candles,etc. and started filling the pool ( we hadn’t done any
practice runs, so think he wanted to make sure it didn’t leak!).
I gravitated to a dark corner of our bedroom and spent a great deal of time
crouching forward in ‘child pose’ during these early contractions..and Pete
was able to massage my back easily in this position. Pete called Andrea again at
about 12.00pm as the contractions seemed to be gaining in intensity. Andrea
arrived about 1pm ( bang went her night’s sleep!) and Sue ( Andrea’s support
midwife ) arrived at about 1.45am. I
was still able to chat in between contractions and was sipping from a glass of
rescue remedy and water very frequently and eating bits of banana to keep the
strength up.
I
decided to get into the pool at about 3.45 am. I think we were all fairly
optimistic that things were progressing quite quickly ..it
certainly seemed that way. Getting in the water was fabulous, the
contractions slowed in frequency but seemed to get more intense. Pete was still
massaging my back all the way through which was wonderful and he was reminding
me to breathe and stay focused. I started to make some very, very deep primal
sounds. I felt completely immersed in the process and at this stage was happy to
go with the flow. Andrea was continually monitoring the baby’s heartbeat and
everything was fine. I was taking homeopathic remedies to keep the energy up and
keep contractions going .
By
8.00pm the following morning though, I started to get a little impatient having
laboured through the night with no indication of much progress, so I got out of
the water and Andrea did a VE exam to assess how things were going. She
estimated I was about 4cm dilated and that the position of the baby’s head was
not totally defined. (having been in near perfect position throughout pregnancy
!). I was a little disheartened and deflated by this, after a whole night of
labouring, so we all agreed the priority now was for us all to try to get some
rest. I also needed to try some different positions to see if we could rotate
the baby’s head round i.e all fours and lying on my left side ). Pete and I
spent all morning trying to get a bit of kip in between 3 minute contractions
..seemed unlikely ..but it’s surprising what you can do ! Sue and Andrea also
tried to grab some much-needed rest.
I
experimented with different positions, I was still sipping rescue remedy and
eating bits of yoghurt and honey to keep energy levels up. By 4.00pm that
afternoon, we decided to do another VE to check progress. I was now 5- 6 cm
dilated..so fairly slow progress again and felt disheartened ( this baby was
choosing to take it’s time ! ..2 weeks overdue, 21 hours into labour and only
this much dilated…clearly testing my strong tendency towards impatience!)
We
now tried some lunges to turn the baby’s head..I was starting to get quite
strong pressure on my sacrum ( lower back ) by this time and wanted strong heat
applied to the area ( we tried a tens machine ..but I didn’t like it ) .
Around 6.00pm I started to go through transition and got a bit tearful ....I
didn’t realise this was transition ..I was off in my own world ..but I heard
Andrea say the word transition and I definatly felt encouraged by that and it
seemed like finally some progress was being made.
But it was not over yet! ..far from it !
At
about 7.30pm ..Andrea did another VE and I was about 9cm dilated by this time…
contractions were very intense by this stage and it was time to start the
pushing process...but my backache was so severe that the contractions slowed
down and it became very difficult to push through the pain. Andrea and Sue were
constantly checking the baby’s heartbeat and everything was fine. I took some
homeopathic remedies to try to increase the frequency of the contractions and
wanted the constant heat of a hot water bottle on my sacrum area .It was at this
stage we discussed the options of transferring into hospital for an epidural,
having some gas and air or just riding it out.
Even
through my semi comatose state, the thought of transferring into hospital after
this length of time and on a blustery November night was not appealing! and I
think this thought gave me the impetus I needed to carry on .. EVENTUALLY after
some hours of different pushing positions, a bit of gas and air and constant
(very important) encouragement from the team that progress was being made, the
baby’s head started to crown and 10 minutes or so later Andrea skilfully
delivered the baby out and onto my chest .
I
can’t describe the feeling of relief and emotion at this point.
It was a very long challenging labour for all of us ..but all that went
out of the window when this little miracle of life appeared in the world. She
came out pink and crying. It’s a really very special moment never to be
forgotten. After a few minutes Andrea had a quick peep at the sex of the baby
…and then Pete got curious too. I was in a dream and it didn’t seem to
matter. The atmosphere in the room was magical.
She
was a beautiful little girl – Kamalika Ishana and weighed in at a healthy 9lb
and 5oz! 
The
placenta came flying out 22 minutes after the birth (obviously didn’t take
it’s cue from the baby!) ..missed the bowl actually !
After
a while I got up tentatively to go to the loo (could barely stand..let alone
walk ) and promptly fainted on the loo..which was a bit of a shock. Andrea and
Sue put me in the recovery position, fed me some yoghurt and honey and some
grape juice to keep
the fluid intake up. Pete sat bonding with his new baby daughter, while I came
round. Andrea,
Sue and Pete then did a fantastic job of clearing and cleaning up and I lay in
blissful state getting to know our new little girl .
It’s
interesting now to reflect how different my birth experience is likely to have
been if I’d been in hospital, without the strong loving support and patience
of Andrea, Pete and Sue and the
willingness of us all to go with the flow ( in our chosen environment ).mentally
, physically and emotionally - I’ve no doubt that there would have been a
great deal of intervention in Kamalika’s birth.
I’ve
realised that birth is always an unpredictable event – you have to keep an
open mind, no matter how much preparation you’ve done, things might not always
turn out the way you plan. But, if you have a very strong support team, faith in
yourself and your baby and a willingness to ‘go with it’ and follow your
instincts – you can do it ..whatever circumstances should present
themselves.
Kamalika,
Pete and I would like to thank Sue for being a fantastic support midwife during
such a challenging labour and Andrea for the love and emotional support she has
shown us during pregnancy, labour and during the postnatal period.
Andrea
is a most wonderful midwife, with a beautiful heart and an inner warmth that
radiates through. We have the utmost respect for her loving kindness, her
intuitive understanding of the birthing process and her wealth of experience.
She has touched our lives very deeply.